Abigail’s actions unveiled her wise and godly heart

by Vanessa White

A woman’s influence is notable; Abigail’s story illustrates the tremendous impact of a woman who speaks with restraint and wisdom in a perilous, unsafe, uncertain situation. Her character demonstrates the beauty and influence of a woman who respects those in authority over her. She is a model of the effectiveness of gracious words.

Oh, may we learn her poise and be women wholeheartedly devoted to God, in submission and surrender to Him.

This Psalm is beautiful; The Glories of the Messiah and His Bride.

Hear, O daughter, consider, submit, and consent to my instruction: forget also your own people and your father’s house; So will the King desire your beauty; because He is your Lord, be submissive and reverence and honor Him. And, O daughter of Tyre, the richest of the people shall entreat your favor with a gift. The King’s daughter in the inner part [of the palace] is all glorious; her clothing is inwrought with gold. [Rev. 19:7, 8.] She shall be brought to the King in raiment of needlework; with the virgins, her companions that follow her, she shall be brought to You. With gladness and rejoicing will they be brought; they will enter into the King’s palace. Psalm 45:10-15 AMPC

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I find it such a delight to glean from these godly biblical women. Reverence and honor were their clothing, and their speech was honorable and gracious. They were crowned with true beauty; their character was exemplary. These women were devoted to God. 

All I can say is, LORD, change me, make me the woman You want me to be. Let reverence and honor, kindness and graciousness be my clothing. Aborn me with Your loving-kindness. Let this vessel bring You honor and glory. Let me magnify Your Holy mighty name. I will glory in my Redeemer, and I will boast in Him, for He is the best Husband ever!

 To the singles, separated, divorced, and widowed, Isaiah 54:5 says, “For your Husband is your Maker, The LORD of hosts is His name; And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel, Who is called the God of the whole earth.   

 For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes on Him will not be put to shame.” Romans 10:11 

By David, Abigail had a son named Chileab, or Daniel (compare 2 Samuel 3:3 with 1 Chronicles 3:1). The latter name means, “God is my Judge,” and one has an inkling that the choice of such a name was Abigail’s because of her experience of divine vindication. — LOCKYER’S

Read 1 Samuel 25

Let’s read 1 Samuel chapter twenty-five. Highlight all that stands out to you.

Let’s pray! LORD FATHER GOD, You are mighty and all-powerful! Splendor, honor, and glory belong to You. We magnify your Holy Mighty name. Your love is steadfast, You are everlasting. Thank You for the power of Your holy Words, thank You for the Bible and all the absolute truth it contains. Thank You for speaking to us, please illuminate the scriptures and help us to apply Your Words to our lives and keep Your Words hidden in our hearts. Please soften our hearts and may we have pliable hearts, to receive Your instructions, change all that needs to be changed in our hearts.

Help us to desire and have a hunger to read Your Word, to spend time with You and exult You because You are worthy to be praised. We love You and we give You all the glory. Speak Lord, Your servant is listening.

Death of Samuel

Then Samuel died; and the Israelites gathered together and lamented for him, and buried him at his home in Ramah. And David arose and went down to the Wilderness of ^[a]Paran.

1 Samuel 25:1

Samuel was such a wonderful prophet of the Lord, precious Hannah was his mother for this child she prayed and dedicated him to the Lord all the days of her life. Hannah kept her vow of commitment to the Lord.

David’s descendants would occupy Isreal’s throne forever, Christ being the fulfillment of the promise The deep respect in which Samuel was held is indicated by the grief that swept across the nation when he died. — William Macdonald

David and the Wife of Nabal

² Now there was a man in Maon whose business was in Carmel, and the man was very rich. He had three thousand sheep and a thousand goats. And he was shearing his sheep in Carmel. ³ The name of the man was Nabal, and the name of his wife Abigail. And she was a woman of good understanding and beautiful appearance; but the man was harsh and evil in his doings. He was of the house of Caleb.

1 Samuel 25:2-3

Nabal is a very wealthy man, his lineage is from the house of Caleb and though this man comes from a goldy household, It clearly states he chose to live a life apart from God, he was harsh and did what was evil. He was known as a fool, harsh and evil. Matthew 5:45 says, “so that you may be sons of your Father in the heavens. For He makes His sun rise on evil and good, and He sends rain on righteous and unrighteous.”

Abigal was a goldy woman who served the Lord, she was known as a woman with good understanding and was beautiful in appearance.

“Eugenia Price, who writes of Abigail as, A Woman With God’s Own Poise, says that, “only God can give a woman poise like Abigail possessed, and God can only do it when a woman is willing to cooperate as Abigail cooperated with Him on every point.” 

⁴ When David heard in the wilderness that Nabal was shearing his sheep, ⁵ David sent ten young men; and David said to the young men, “Go up to Carmel, go to Nabal, and greet him in my name. ⁶ And thus you shall say to him who lives in prosperity: ‘Peace be to you, peace to your house, and peace to all that you have! ⁷ Now I have heard that you have shearers. Your shepherds were with us, and we did not hurt them, nor was there anything missing from them all the while they were in Carmel. ⁸ Ask your young men, and they will tell you. Therefore ^[b]let my young men find favor in your eyes, for we come on a feast day. Please give whatever comes to your hand to your servants and to your son David.’ ”

1 Samuel 25:4-8

David went down to the wilderness of Paran possibly to flee and get away from Saul and his horrible schemes. Michal, David’s wife was given to another man, Saul did this apparently to spite David. 1 Samuel 25:44. How awful. That must have really hurt David’s heart. I cannot even imagine what that would feel like.

David speaks with gracious kindness, he is asking for help and in return, he has guarded and protected Nabal’s shepherds and flock. Take a look at Nabal’s arrogance his disrespectful response.

¹⁰ Then Nabal answered David’s servants, and said, “Who is David, and who is the son of Jesse? There are many servants nowadays who break away each one from his master. ¹¹ Shall I then take my bread and my water and my ^[c]meat that I have killed for my shearers, and give it to men when I do not know where they are from?”

1 Samuel 25:10-11

Oh the arrogance and disgust of Nabal, he surely knew who David was. When these things were reported back to David he became furious and ordered his men to gird their swords, David girded his sword as well. David and about four hundred men headed to Carmel. He wanted to destroy the works of Nabal, him, and all of his household.

Now one of the young men told Abigail, Nabal’s wife, saying, “Look, David sent messengers from the wilderness to greet our master; and he ^[d]reviled them. ¹⁵ But the men were very good to us, and we were not hurt, nor did we miss anything as long as we accompanied them, when we were in the fields. ¹⁶ They were a wall to us both by night and day, all the time we were with them keeping the sheep. ¹⁷ Now therefore, know and consider what you will do, for harm is determined against our master and against all his household. For he is such a scoundrel^[e] that one cannot speak to him.”

1 Samuel 25:14-17

Is not the enemy the one who is the author of confusion and disunity, there is never any godly fellowship at all with darkness, there is always division, chaos, while the spirit of the Lord brings peace, love, joy, patience, kindness, gentleness, the fruits of the Spirit and it brings freedom! “Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom,” 2 Corinthians 3:17, Galatians 5:22–23, Galatians 5:13, Romans 8:5, Romans 14:17.

Answer a fool according to his folly, Lest he be wise in his own eyes. Proverbs 26:5 

Abigail is winsome and wise, she uses wisdom

¹⁸ Then Abigail made haste and took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five sheep already dressed, five seahs of roasted grain, one hundred clusters of raisins, and two hundred cakes of figs, and loaded them on donkeys. ¹⁹ And she said to her servants, “Go on before me; see, I am coming after you.” But she did not tell her husband Nabal.

1 Samuel 25:18-19

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We see diligence in her faith. She lives with a difficult man, yet, she is a woman with such poise.

Ephesians 5:11 says, And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them. Abigail chose to serve the Lord at all cost, she did not hide her husband’s sin, she exposed the true nature of his heart. She did not display a false picture of him, and she did it with respect because she said to David in V. 24, “So she fell at his feet and said: “On me, my lord, on me let this iniquity be! And please let your maidservant ^[f]speak in your ears, and hear the words of your maidservant. and V. 25, says, “Please, let not my lord ^[g]regard this scoundrel Nabal. For as his name is, so is he: ^[h]Nabal is his name, and folly is with him! But I, your maidservant, did not see the young men of my lord whom you sent.” 

Abigail was wise; she had discernment on what she could speak to her ungodly husband.

V. 19, And she said to her servants, “Go on before me; see, I am coming after you.” But she did not tell her husband Nabal.

There are simply things of God that a woman of God cannot share with an ungodly husband.

The ungodly man has no regard for the things of God, nor does his heart comprehend holiness, godliness, being set apart for God’s glory, or the things of eternity. The earthly man’s desires are focused on the here and now, perversity, selfish gain, carnal mindedness, arrogance, fleshly desires, a self-focused life, no boundaries, and an ungodly appetite for the things of this world. This destructive list can go on and on.

Scripture says, “Don’t waste what is holy on people who are unholy. Don’t throw your pearls to pigs! They will trample the pearls, then turn and attack you. Matthew 7:6 NLT

Forever grateful to be called out of darkness and into His marvelous light. Only then can we see and understand the things of God. For with You is the fountain of life; In Your light we see light. Psalm 36:9

Abigail’s Gracious Reply

Now when Abigail saw David, she dismounted quickly from the donkey, fell on her face before David, and bowed down to the ground. 24 So she fell at his feet and said: “On me, my lord, on me let this iniquity be! And please let your maidservant [f]speak in your ears, and hear the words of your maidservant. 25 Please, let not my lord [g]regard this scoundrel Nabal. For as his name is, so is he: [h]Nabal is his name, and folly is with him! But I, your maidservant, did not see the young men of my lord whom you sent. 26 Now therefore, my lord, as the Lord lives and as your soul lives, since the Lord has held you back from coming to bloodshed and from avenging[i] yourself with your own hand, now then, let your enemies and those who seek harm for my lord be as Nabal. 27 And now this present which your maidservant has brought to my lord, let it be given to the young men who follow my lord. 28 Please forgive the trespass of your maidservant. For the Lord will certainly make for my lord an enduring house, because my lord fights the battles of the Lord, and evil is not found in you throughout your days. 29 Yet a man has risen to pursue you and seek your life, but the life of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of the living with the Lord your God; and the lives of your enemies He shall sling out, as from the pocket of a sling. 30 And it shall come to pass, when the Lord has done for my lord according to all the good that He has spoken concerning you, and has appointed you ruler over Israel, 31 that this will be no grief to you, nor offense of heart to my lord, either that you have shed blood without cause, or that my lord has avenged himself. But when the Lord has dealt well with my lord, then remember your maidservant.”

1 Samuel 25:23-31

LOCKYER’S exposition is well written, he states; “Nabal was also a drunken wretch, as well as being unmanageable and stubborn and ill-tempered. Doubtless he was often “very drunken.” This wretch of a man was likewise an unbeliever, “a son of Belial,” who bowed his knee to the god of this world and not to the God of his fathers. Further, as a follower of Saul he shared the rejected king’s jealousy of David. Added to his brutal disposition and evil doings was that of stupidity, as his name suggests. Pleading for his unworthy life, Abigail asked for mercy because of his foolishness. “As his name is, so is he; Nabal is his name, and folly is with him” (vs 25). Nabal means “a fool,” and what Abigail actually meant was, “Pay no attention to my wretched husband for he’s a fool by name, and a fool by nature.” Truly, such a man will always provoke the profoundest perversion in all who read his story.”

David’s Gracious Response

Then David said to Abigail: “Blessed is the Lord God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me! ³³ And blessed is your advice and blessed are you, because you have kept me this day from coming to bloodshed and from avenging myself with my own hand. ³⁴ For indeed, as the Lord God of Israel lives, who has kept me back from hurting you, unless you had hurried and come to meet me, surely by morning light no males would have been left to Nabal!” ³⁵ So David received from her hand what she had brought him, and said to her, “Go up in peace to your house. See, I have heeded your voice and respected your person.”

1 Samuel 25:32-35

Proverbs 11:16 (GNT), A gracious woman is respected, but a woman without virtue is a disgrace.

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She speaks not a word until morning

³⁶ Now Abigail went to Nabal, and there he was, holding a feast in his house, like the feast of a king. And Nabal’s heart was merry within him, for he was very drunk; therefore she told him nothing, little or much, until morning light. ³⁷ So it was, in the morning, when the wine had gone from Nabal, and his wife had told him these things, that his heart died within him, and he became like a stone. ³⁸ Then it happened, after about ten days, that the Lord struck Nabal, and he died.

1 Samuel 25:36-38

It is never wise to communicate with a drunken man, for he cannot comprehend nor is he in the right state of mind.

What a faithful woman; despite her difficult marriage, she stayed the course and was committed to her vows for better or worse until death does us part.

Ponder

How did Abigail live in such a problematic marriage?

How did Abigail live with such poise in the midst of a difficult marriage?

How do we live with people who act like fools?

Have I ever acted like a fool?

Have I ever been difficult with people? At times, could my behavior or attitude be challenging with people?

There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. We all make mistakes; we sin, we fall short of the golry of God. We are all in need of grace and mercy and forgiveness.

I think it is crucial for us to search our hearts and admit when we mess up and fall short– when we sin, we should seek God and ask for His forgiveness. He is always there to extend His grace, peace, and forgiveness. He restores us.

Marriage proposal

39 So when David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, “Blessed be the Lord, who has pleaded the cause of my reproach from the hand of Nabal, and has kept His servant from evil! For the Lord has returned the wickedness of Nabal on his own head.”

And David sent and proposed to Abigail, to take her as his wife. 40 When the servants of David had come to Abigail at Carmel, they spoke to her saying, “David sent us to you, to ask you to become his wife.” 1 Samuel 25:39-40

V. 25:39-44 Abigail believed that David would be king over Israel, and greatly esteemed his pious and excellent character. She deemed his proposal of marriage honourable, and advantageous to her, notwithstanding his present difficulties. With great humility, and doubtless agreeably to the customs of those times, she consented, being willing to share his trails. Thus those who join themselves to Christ, must be willing now to suffer with him, believing that hereafter they shall reign with him. — Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

⁴¹ Then she arose, bowed her face to the earth, and said, “Here is your maidservant, a servant to wash the feet of the servants of my lord.” ⁴² So Abigail rose in haste and rode on a donkey, ^[j]attended by five of her maidens; and she followed the messengers of David, and became his wife. ⁴³ David also took Ahinoam of Jezreel, and so both of them were his wives.

⁴⁴ But Saul had given Michal his daughter, David’s wife, to ^[k]Palti the son of Laish, who was from Gallim.

1 Samuel 25:41-44

Abigail displays such humility, and she addresses herself as a maidservant; she calls herself a servant; it is an expression of humility and submission.

Verse 41 is so beautiful it displays nobility and honor; a royal princess indeed!

1 Samuel 25:41, reminds me of John 13:1–17 Jesus Washes the Disciples’ Feet.

When Jesus rose from the table and began to wash the feet of the disciples (John 13:4), He was doing the work of the lowliest of servants. The disciples must have been stunned at this act of humility and condescension, that Christ, their Lord and master, should wash the feet of His disciples, when it was their proper work to have washed His. But when Jesus came to earth the first time, He came not as King and Conqueror, but as the suffering Servant of Isaiah 53. As He revealed in Matthew 20:28, He came “not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” The humility expressed by His act with towel and basin foreshadowed His ultimate act of humility and love on the cross. {Source}

Lessons to be learned from the life of Abigail

Among the lessons to be learned from the life of Abigail, the first is surely evident, namely, that much heartache follows when a Christian woman marries an unbeliever. Unequal yokes do not promote true and abiding happiness. The tragedy in Abigail’s career began when she married Nabal, a young man of Naon. Already we have asked the question, Why did she marry such a man? Why did such a lovely girl throw herself away upon such a brute of a man? According to the custom of those times marriages were man-made, the woman having little to say about the choice of a husband. Marriage was largely a matter of family arrangement. Nabal was of wealthy parentage and rich in his own right with 3,000 sheep and 1,000 goats and thus seemed a good catch for Abigail. But character should be considered before possessions.

Many a woman in the world today made her own choice of a partner. Perhaps she knew of his failures and thought that after marriage she would reform him, but found herself joined to one whose ways became more evil. Then think of those brave, unmurmuring wives who have to live with the fool of a husband whose drunken, crude ways are repellant, yet who, by the grace of God accept and live with their trial; and who, because of a deep belief in divine sufficiency retain their poise. Such living martyrs are among God’s heroines. All of us know of those good women chained with the fetters of a wretched married life for whom it would be infinitely better for them—

To lie in their graves where the head, heart and breast,

From care, labour and sorrow forever should rest.

Thinking of modern Abigails the appropriate lines of noble Elizabeth Barrett Browning come to mind—

The sweetest lives are those to duty wed,

Whose deeds, both great and small, and closeknit strands

Of an unbroken thread; where love ennobles all.

The World may sound no trumpets, ring no bells:

The Book of Life the shining record tells

.© 1988 Zondervan. All Rights Reserved Read More, {Source}

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father,

Almighty and everlasting God, You are sovereign and the eternal King who reigns forever. Majestic and glorious You are. Splendor and honor belong to You. We praise You and give You all the glory. Make us Your faithful daughters who delight ourselves in You. Let the law of kindness be upon our lips. Let dignity, honor, reverence, and Your precious grace be our clothing; clothe us with Your robes of righteousness, crown us with Your everlasting love. Let Your gentleness in our life be evident to all. Let our words glorify You, give us elegant speech, may our words be salty so that others will thirst for You, the true living God.

Thank You for Your faithfulness and the power of Your Holy Words. May our hearts take great delight in every word You speak to us. Fill us with Your wisdom and understanding.

In Jesus Holy Mighty Name. Amen.

RESOURCES FOR FURTHER STUDY

LOCKYER’S ALL THE WOMEN OF THE BIBLE – ABIGAIL